Day 356 ~ "Marriage"

What I Learned About Me... from A to Z

What have I learned about myself this past year {blogging}..?  hmmmm... First off... I would like to make sure you know up front... I never had blogged before until I started this blog 349 days ago.  Secondly... I never intended on learning anything.  HAHA! LOL!  No but seriously... It wasn't my intention...   Check out what my intention(s) were/are here.

So here goes... What I Learned About Me... from A to Z

"M" is for...  Marriage.     

Not that I did not know about marriage before blogging... I did.


What I do want to do is share a few things I have learned along the way.  Seems once you have survived an unhealthy relationship... you know how to avoid the same and strive to living a healthy one.

First off and most importantly is to "choose your battles" ... basically don't sweat the small stuff.  Included with this line of thought is "give and take".  

If you must fight... please fight fair.  Cursing and name calling are definitely NOT PERMITTED.  Words may be forgiven, yet never forgotten.  You can never take them back... once said, that's it.  So... set boundaries to fighting fair when you first are committed to one another and stick to them. 

Never go to sleep mad.  I know this is a tough one.. been there done that!  The goal here would be ... if you must, walk away... go for a walk... take a tour of your yard... cool off.  Take a look at the argument from your husband or wife's point of view. 

Please... there's definitely NO room for pride in marriage either... none whatsoever.  You must be able to apologize when deemed necessary [go on suck it up~ life's too short... especially if you know you're wrong] and no gloating on the receiving end either.  {it takes courage to apologize... don't you think?  last thing you want to hear is gloating.}

Don't forget... always kiss your love one good-bye when you're off to work.  {and} always ... always... tell them you love them each time you see them {and say good-bye}.

Take it from someone that has been married more than once {and has seen and been in my share of bad relationships} ... it's the little things in life that matter.  

We aren't here forever... let's love with all the desire to be loved.  


Let's be  married  the way we desire to be  married .

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
~ Mignon McLaughlin

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.  ~1 Peter 4:8 

Tomorrow...  What I Learned About Me... from A to Z ... the letter(s) "N" & "O". 

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

9 days to go... {single digits!!...}

read about this count down in my "About my Blog" page

... for a, l & c.  you are my sunshine(s).

Images are courtesy of either google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barilá Karam and of this blog- Taking Back My Life ~ Making it My Own.  US Copyright law apply  ©

Day 270 ~ Oh Jibber Jabber!

I have always been someone who easily adjusts to my surroundings... especially when it comes to  my potty mouth.  


Let me explain that I grew up with an Argentinian father, who not only spoke his mind, but who also did not ever sensor himself!  Then adding to the mix, the father of my sons, an auto mechanic by trade since he was eighteen, he did not have the nicest vocabulary either... let's just say that he was a tad bit racist with his comments.  Finally, most of my life I have hung out with guys, and I was bartender for nearly six years on and off.

Okay... there you have it! ...  I can have a potty mouth.  The operative word there is "can"... not that I always do, but I can.  Now, that "can" really, really comes out mostly when I'm driving and I get frustrated or very, very angry!


Now... since Calley came into our lives, I guess you can say that my language has cleaned up  at home.  Then, the fact that we have since moved to El Paso, the end of the bible belt here, this only helps the cause of not cursing.  And if anything has ever slipped out... well I covered it up with a similar sounding word... "I was thinking of making duck..., yes duck, that's what I said..."  

The other day, Calley and I ventured out in the city.  Yes, ventured.  Because any day out on the El Paso streets is an adventure!  You just never know what is going to happen.  While running errands, this absolute MORON crossed over three lanes, cut in front of me to make the left onto the freeway.  The great thing about it, he was driving a company truck.  I didn't even get upset... You guess it!  I called the 800 number on the truck and reported the truck number!  Take that, you absolute #$%% MORON!


Hold on now... relax.  I promise you that I did not get that graphic with Calley in the car, but I did call him a STUPID MORON. 


Then all of a sudden I get this vision in my head of the principal calling me into her office because Calley called a classmate a stupid moron.  Oy!  That's all I need!


Seconds later ... I immediately apologized to Calley.  I proceeded to explain to her that mommy was wrong to call that person a name, not matter how stupid they were... Just kidding!  I didn't say that last part.  She has no clue what "moron" means, but the fact that I said it in a negative tone is all she needed to hear in order to repeat it.  


I continued to explain to her that sometimes mommy gets sooo frustrated and or upset, and she shouldn't...  (But when someone cuts you off and you have to brake... well, I'm sure you understand.)  ... so she explodes and a bad word comes out!


How about this... I continued, let's make up a word, a funny word, and every time mommy gets frustrated in the car, or at home, I will say it.  Calley immediately interrupted me asking if she could say it too it she was frustrated.  Needless to say, I had to hold back the laughter. and NO she may not say it.


The rest of our journey home, which included a stop at the grocery store, was spent laughing as we were making words up left and right... until finally, we came up with a word.  Two actually.  Wait for it.... Wait for it....

Jibber Jabber!   

We've already have had to use it a few times.  And it's perfect!  The moment I say it may have started in anger, but each and every time we break out into laughter!  Now that's how I like to let out my frustrations... with laughter!  

And yes, I explained to Calley that Jibber Jabber is our "game' we play in the car.  It is not that we are calling those people Jibber Jabber... we are not calling anyone names, it's just not nice.  The intention of the word is to break the moment and make me laugh... and above all, not to cuss.  

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.  ~ Ephesians 4:29

But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.  ~ Colossians  3:8

In 2007, McKay Hatch, a 14 year old boy in South Pasadena, California, challenged his friends not to cuss.  As a response to one of his friends who said that he didn't know how, he started the No Cussing Club.  Check out his site here.
So here it is... 

The NO CUSSING Challenge!
I won't cuss, swear, use bad language, or tell dirty jokes.  Clean language is a sign of intelligence and always demands respect.  I will use my language to uplift, encourage and motivate.  I will Leave People Better Than I Found Them!   

I probably won't last week!   wink, wink.

Blessings to all!!

95 days to go...

PS... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Some images courtesy of google and bing images.  U.S Copyright laws may apply.  ©