Day 496 ~ When it Really Matters (IX)

Day 9 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

"...he won by the conduct of their wives" (1 Peter 3:1)) 

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

We are often so busy speaking that we don't take time to listen. We are so quick to offer a comment - negative or positive—that we don't really "hear" our husband's heart.  Remember: we have two ears and only one mouth. We need to listen more!

As you continue in your 30-day challenge, not speaking negatively and focusing on positive encouragement, hear the Lord's admonition today: "Be swift to hear." If listening is a real problem for you, play a game with yourself. See if you can listen to your husband for one whole day, only speaking when asked a question. If your husband notices the difference, explain that you are learning to listen more-not only to God, but also to him.

One easy way to express admiration for your husband is to ask a question about something he enjoys, and then listen to his response. If it's an area of personal familiarity, keep asking questions until you learn something you didn't know, then tell him, "Wow, I didn't know that!"

Here's day 9 ...   

I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

A fine example of this was our disagreement the other day.  "I did not engage as I once did.  I allowed him to say his peace and I held my tongue. ..."

To allow your husband to speak his mind all the whilst you listen to his (for lack of  a better word) ranting, regardless whether you agree or not... biting your toungue ... much strength is needed.

I don't know what is tougher... keeping your thoughts to yourself all the while knowing you're in the right... or ... sucking in the negativitiy being spoken to you knowing you're right?

Let me put it to you this way... I have learned to refrain from making a big deal about nothing and being listened to when speaking up when it reallymatters...

Hmmm...

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 329 ~ What!? No Tone? Just Ask.

Have you ever said something and had it taken the wrong way?  Better yet, can you tell if someone misunderstands you when you are speaking face to face to them?  Usually you can tell by their response or that whacked out look on their face... (slight sarcasm) and it can be remedied  with a mere explanation, right?  Right.

Now... have you ever written something with the intention of meaning one thing (white) and have it taken completely wrong (black)?  Not that THAT has happened to me, but close enough.  

I have found that when I am face to face with someone and (of course) I am tuned in to their responses, body language and tone in their voice, and I can pretty much respond immediately to any misunderstanding.  [Okay, so there have been a few times I miss the cue and don't get it until that night... BUT...] I immediately back track, and explain myself.  I will even draw pictures if I have too.  (sarcasm, trying to be funny..lol)

That is face to face.  Simple enough, right?  Right.  With writing... IT'S ANOTHER STORY!!  

As a writer (because I do write my blog, therefore I am a writer- I say this because one of my fellow bloggers was told she wasn't a writer... WHAT!!!  SERIOUSLY!!??  That's exactly what I thought!) my main goal is to get a message across to my reader. That includes s-a-r-c-a-s-m, humor, coloring words, emphasizing where needed and being sympathetic when called for.

However, sometimes that is not enough.  HELLOOO! (sarcasm). As shown, I have started implementing descriptions within parenthesis to avoid misunderstandings.  Not only for the reader, but myself as well.

When I am writing, it's as if I dictate to myself... I talk in my head, and I type what I hear.  {I think it's funny}... If you ask me, it sounds crazy.  Whatever I hear, I write, tone and all.    {It's as if I have little voices in my head! oooooo ooooo (trying to be funny, with a little sarcasm)}  After I'm done, I usually re-read what I have written and emphasize tone and meaning and adjust accordingly.  Then I hope to God I didn't miss anything and I get my message across AS INTENDED.

I don't know about you, but I can be silly, sarcastic, goofy and love life to be fun.  

   

SO with that said... I certainly hope I have gotten my message across.  Sure, I know that I have my opinions, as do you.  Right?  Right.  {I thought you'd agree with me.}  (attempt at a little humor,with a chuckle)

Honestly, I just want to be understood.  I mean no harm.  No harm to anyone.  If anything I want to help! (big smile)

SOOOOOO... if by chance there is a day that I may have forgotten a parenthesis or two, or didn't color my words... PLEASE do not jump to conclusions (not even in real life please) ... PLEASE ask.  Email me, ask me... "Carla, what were you thinking?  Did you mean...?"

Real life is no different... if you don't get it OR if you think.... "OH NO SHE DIDN'T!"  (little humor) PLEASE... please ask.  Not just if it's me... if it's someone you know... ASK.  Sometimes you may think that you understood one thing, and after asking ... you find out how off you were.  More importantly, you avoided a HUGE misunderstanding.  

Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.  ~Albert Einstein

Understanding is a two-way street.                                                                  ~Eleanor Roosevelt

It isn't until you come to a spiritual understanding of who you are - not necessarily a religious feeling, but deep down, the spirit within - that you can begin to take control.  ~Oprah Winfrey

Blessings to all,

36 days to go...  

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Taking Back My Life ~ Making It My Own.  U.S Copyright laws apply.  © 2012