Day 217 ~ Moving Forward, Never Straight

There are two things I hate about being sick or laid back (whichever you prefer.)  

1. I feel forced to take it easy when there are tons to do, and
2. As if I was painted into a corner, I am forced to think about life's happenings, or rather being left with my thoughts [because there is only so much tv one can watch, and I had to stay off my computer most of the day (should have been all day).]

Needless to say, I am getting out of the house tomorrow!  (lol!)  I am taking the bloggeritis by its horns!

Seriously, I do not want to go down that road anymore.  I am so done with it.  I have to keep telling myself that I can not change the past... It is done and over... I can not control what others do or think... I need to accept what has happened and I need to look forward.  

Funny memory, I would always tell my sons that we always move forward in a car, not straight.  Answer at the end of this post.  

I also am aware, and keep reminding myself that I have learned from the past... I have become stronger from the past... I am who I am because of the past... I have accepted all that has happened and I am working for tomorrow.

As for each present moment I am a part of, I will continue to be the best person I can be... I will continue to take care of myself for a better lifestyle... I will do right by myself, giving myself new positive experiences to look back on.

Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice.  ~ Wayne Dyer

Begin to be now what you will be hereafter.  ~ William James

Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.   ~ Norman Vincent Peale

Did you get it?  answer:  Most roads are not straight, they curve.  Hence, we move forward.

Blessings to all!!

148 days to go...

PS... Sons, I love and miss you.  To the moon and stars above and back.  You are my sunshines.

Images are courtesy of Walt Disney, Walt Disney Studios and Bing images.

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied.  All accounts herein are written by Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life.  Some names may be changed to protect the innocent or protect me from the guilty.  (just kidding...wink, wink)

Day 150 ~ Cease and Desist

The other day (Day 144) I briefly mentioned the "D" word.

Yes, drugs.  Let me make this perfectly clear.  I do not want my use of drugs in my past define who I am.  Nor will I make any excuses for it.  I think it was a waste of time and money, and more importantly drugs are bad for you and your body.

I think people refer to it as recreational usage.  I just thought of it as a "happy place" away from the realities of my life.  I was young.  My late teenage years, through my early twenties.  

Once again, I feel very grateful to the fact that I was able to recognize what was going on, and I cease and desist (halt all activity.)

I am not claiming to be a "sober" person.  I do like my wine and my martinis and other spirits of such, however I do not dabble on the dark side for quite some time!  I did at one point feel that I was hanging out at clubs too much in my mid thirties (after the horrendous court battle with my boys' father) which prompted me to move back to Los Angeles and put my life back together.

One thing is certain, once you sober up you have to face all the problems you were once running away from.  And with that... I grabbed all my baggage and took it to a therapist.

I loved therapy.  However, it is very important to have the right therapist.  This makes a HUGE difference.  I feel that therapy and honesty, when used together, makes for a successful journey.  I had to be 100% honest with myself in order to understand everything, accept responsibility for my work and stop blaming myself for what was not my doing.  

Taking all that I have experienced, what I have learned from it, good and bad, I am really happy with who I am.  I accept what I have done and what I have experienced... the good, the bad and the ugly...  for it has made me the me I am today.

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

~  Winston Churchill

I am thankful for the person I have grown into being.

Blessings to all!!

215 days to go...

PS... I just could not resist with the Winston Churchill quote.  I love it!  ;)  (wink, wink)

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.