Showing posts with label Gary Chapman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gary Chapman. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Day 482 ~ Dealing With Passion (Anger)

A little over two weeks ago I shared with you how "passionate" I am... lol!!  Okay... my anger issues.  (click here to catch up)

Okay... let me set something straight here... I am not a mean person.  I have always been very very kind... unless someone hurts me or my own... then that's a different story.

But what I have noticed in the last couple of years, thanks to Perimenopause, is that once in a while my evil twin comes out of nowhere, reacts and takes over.  What's more is that there are times that I remind myself of my father, his response(s) towards me... his ugliness.

I am not ugly as he was, but it is a little eerie.  Sometimes I hear his words coming out of my mouth... and I come to a screeching stop.

I blame my temper on all the bad things that have happened to me, the bullies, my father, and my sons' father.  I am not trying to make excuses or point fingers... however through my "passionate" class (anger management class) I am learning about my "triggers"... and those triggers are situations that present themselves that bring up old issues or unresolved feelings.

Now... I stand by my belief that what is in the past is in the past and I can not do anything to change it... today is today and I will not allow my past to rob the happiness of my today or tomorrow.

I can't dwell on past issues... BUT I can learn from those experiences to make my today and tomorrow HAPPY!

In class, we are using Gary Chapman's book Anger: Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way.  [Gary is the same author that also wrote the Five Love Languages. (Love that book!)]  

Gary does use scripture for the foundation of how to handle anger.  At first I was a bit skeptical being that I have spent years on therapy couches (LOL- got to laugh about this today wink, wink)  However, what did I have to loose... after all it was scripture.

One thing that I have learned, which is also common sense, is not to act on anger... sit on it a bit and try to find out more information as to why something upset you.  If someone did something, more information is needed... and when speaking to a person, always do so in a loving way.
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body. 26 “In your anger do not sin”[d]: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 28 Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands,that they may have something to share with those in need.
29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.  ~Ephesians 4:25-32
[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...


I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Day 467 ~ I'm Passionate, Not Angry

So... don't laugh now... but I am taking an "anger management" class through my church.  

Don't get the wrong idea now... I mean... granted, I am starting to go through "the change" and my hormones have been running wild, but I am not generally an angry person.  I am passionate!  Sooo... It's a class for "passionate" people!

The class is based off of Gary Chapman's book Anger: Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way.  Gary is the same author that also wrote the Five Love Languages. (Love that book!)

In light of what happen yesterday I decided that some homework today may be helpful to my situation...

WOW! I was right...

Here are a few of the verses that kinda made me go hmmmmmm...
For it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy." ~1 Peter 1:16
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 28 Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need.    29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. ~Ephesians 4:26-32
A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense. ~Proverbs 19:11
Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted among the wise. ~Proverbs 19:20
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.   ~Proverbs 29:11
[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...


I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Day 425 ~ #17 of My 30 Days of Truth

My 30 Days of Truth challenge   I will admit that I changed one question and changed a few curse words... other than that the challenge is intact. 

Day 17:  Name a book you've read that changed your views on something...

4 words...

"The Five Love Languages"- How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate... by Gary Chapman

I can not speak highly enough about this book.

I strongly feel that ALL couples BEFORE they get married MUST read this book - TOGETHER!!

This book really has opened my eyes to a new way of understanding humans, love and relationships.  

Unbeknownst to me, not everyone speaks the same love language and this book helped me .. first, know that... secondly, understand it... and finally, interpret it.

I would not want to spoil it for you... 

I can not tell you enough how much it has changed my life!!

I KNOW it will do the same for you.

My love language, acts of service and receiving gifts.  My husband's, quality time and physical touch... he loves back rubs.  :)

What's yours?
It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues,they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.  ~ 1 Corinthians 13:5-8

Where I've been and where I'm going next...  
Day 17 : A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 : Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 : What do you think of religion?  Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 : Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 : (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 : Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 : Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 : Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 : The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 : Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 : What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 : Name a decision you made that caused a chain of events that would not have happened if it wasn't for that decision.
Day 29 : Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 : A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself
Hey if you want to join along... well let me know in a comment and I'll visit your challenge each day.  We could even link up our blogs.  wink, wink.  No.. seriously we could.

Here's to 30 Days of Truth!

I am second.

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...


... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.