Day 77 ~ A Shout Out ... Filled With Gratitude

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When I started writing my blog, as I have mentioned, I wanted to put my story out there for my children and my family so they could understand me a little more... and to possibly help someone.  

Having said that... I knew that my blog had to be read... however... I cannot believe all the cities that my blog has been read in!!  

I am dedicating tonight's post to all of those who have read my blog... I hope in some way I have either helped you, or at least made you laugh.   ~ wink, wink

Some of you may have only read my blog once, and others couldn't resist coming back for more... Either way... a big thank you!!!  and then some of you may not like what I write...  a quick note to you...  if you don't like what I experienced, how do you think I felt going through it all?

Regardless... I hope in some way I have toughed your heart, and maybe even made you laugh once or twice...  any way you look at it... 

a shout out to each an every one of you (a heartfelt hello)... you know who you are... ~ wink, wink.  ... this post is for you!!

courtesy of Bing images

...   as south as Porto Alegre, Rio de Janeiro and Sao Jose do Rio Preto, Sao Paulo - Brazil...   as north as on the borders of Nunavut and Manitoba, and in Vancouver Canada...   Alexandria, Egypt...   Paris, France...   as north as New Delhi, as west as Gujarat, Chennai and,  south of Dubbak and Vishakhapatnam in India...    Germany...    Malaysia...    near Amsterdam and Rotterdam in the Netherlands...   southern city in Pakistan...    Lima, Peru...   near the cities of Manila and Batagas City and near the small island of Banton in the Phillipeans...   southern Poland...   Moskva in Russia...   Singapore...   as well as near the cities of Seoul and Busan in South Korea...   near the cities of Birmingham, London, Oxford and just north of Stockton-on in the United Kingdom... 

I also want to pay homage to those back home, in the States, some old friends... and some new... may God Bless you too!

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Normal, Alabama...   near Phoenix and in Tucson, Arizona...   near San Francisco, Los Angeles and San Diego, California...   Pensacola and Port Charlotte, Florida...   just outside of Atlanta and Huntsville, Georgia...   near Boise, Idaho...   the windy city- Chicago, Illinois...   Council Bluffs, Iowa...   just northeast of Wichita, Kansas...   south of New Orleans and Thibodaux, Louisiana...   a border city in Massachusetts...   Las Vegas, Nevada...   New York...   close to Cleveland, Ohio...   near Rapid City, South Dakota...   Austin, El Paso and San Antonio, Texas...   Seattle, Washington...   southwest of Washington D.C.... Milwaukee, Wisconsin...     

I really hope, that I in some way, have brought you a little insight, encouragement and support, possibly even some joy or even maybe an "Aha" moment... as much insight, encouragement and support, and "Aha" moments as writing this blog has brought me!   This one is for you!

A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue, but the parent of all other virtues.   -- Cicero

At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.   -- Albert Schweitzer

Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.   -- Brian Tracy 

Blessings to all!!

288 days / 41 weeks to go

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.

Day 76 ~ Just In Case I Don't Get A Chance to Tell You...

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Once again, I find myself wondering how to put what I'm feeling, what I'm thinking and above all, the love I feel for not only my children, but my Dino, family and friends ... to words.

There was something that caught my eye on t.v today...  next thing I knew someone was saying with such depth and love, "... we never know when we are going to go... any one of us ... at any time... if we'll ever see each other again..."

With that in mind, I would like to take this opportunity...

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Since the moment I laid eyes on all my children... I am honored to say that I was the first to ever kiss you... and from that moment on... well let's just say that "you had me at Hello..."  Funny... it won't be until they themselves are parents before they really understand how much I love them!  I have no problem waiting.  (big smile)

courtesy of Bing images

As far as my family is concerned... each and every one of them have impacted my life in one way or another.  A bond has grown, without our choosing.  It's been said that "... we can't choose our family."  and then they also say... "...life is like a roller coaster... there's a certain high you're always on... that you don't want to get off." 

I guess you could say that, I would not be who I am without them.

courtesy of Bing images

Then there are my friends... my "Dream Team."  Where do I begin?  ... What I can say, is that... I don't know where I would be without you, let alone, who I would be...  I cherish all our times together and keep them tucked away in my heart.  Each and every one of you have a place in my heart.  I don;t know if you know this... but...you have helped me, with your own strengths, how to grow within myself and as a result I have become stronger as each day goes by.

Above all I thank you for giving me the best gift of all... by believing in me you have helped me believe in myself!  Thank you so much for having "my back"!

I  just wanted to take this time to tell you how much you mean to me... and when the day comes ... when my number is finally called... please... please laugh! YES!! LAUGH!!!  (and have a drink for me  -  BIG smile!!)  I want you to tell stories, go ahead I give you permission to embarrass me!  LOL!!  Finally, please, let my children know of the wonderful times we had together... and while I watch them from above I somehow know that I can count on you to help me with them down here.   

courtesy of Bing images

... as far as Dino... well ... he is such a wonderful person and deserves nothing but happiness... especially for putting up with me all these years!  LOL!!  (big smile)  However.. it would be nice if he missed me "just" a little.  (wink, wink)  - my attempt to being funny, again!

(big BIG heartfelt smile!) 

((((( big BIG HUG )))))

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.  ~Mother Teresa

Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction.  ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars, 1939, translated from French by Lewis Galantière

 Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be.    ~  Grandma Moses

Blessings to all!!

289 days to go

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.

Day 52 ~ 48... the New 38!!

My 30th high school reunion was tonight... one word... FUN!  

What a great night!

I had been keeping myself busy up until I had to get ready, just so I wouldn't get anxious and cancel out.  Yes, in the past I have worked myself up so much that I actually would not go to functions due to anxiety of "what ifs". But, that is behind me now!

I was sporting a great new hair cut (and color), thanks to the future famous Chëlseá, I lost a total of 9 pounds (thanks to My Wii Fit 21-Day Challenge), and I was in a great place!

After battling the Southern California traffic on the 101... I finally arrived at the Sheraton Universal... Dean and Calley, well they were having and daddy/daughter day long date. Just as I arrived I saw a good ol' (not using the word in reference to our ages by any means!!) friend from school... she looked fabulous!!  Way to go Melinda! ... We were so happy to see each other,  not only because we were friends... but I think more so because we were "flying solo" and did not want to walk in alone.  NO! It's not like going to the bathroom with your girlfriend!  It's just easier walking into a function with a friend in hand, as opposed to making "an entrance"... and I am sooo not about that! 

Then... it happened!  I saw my SISSY!! and the shrieks all started!!!

I strongly feel that if it wasn't for Facebook, and the fact that I have re-connected with so many friends, as well as re-connected with acquaintances, who now have become dear friends... (let's just say I could not picture my life without them ever again!!) ... I more than likely would not have gone to the reunion.

So the Carlas spotted one another!! Thing one and thing two, as another friend calls us... and then there were so many other wonderful people. Carla has become such an important part of my life...a most definite "Angel" and part of my "Dream Team."   I feel blessed to have become friends with her later in life.  I strongly believe once again, that God works in mysterious ways and places people in your life when you need them most.  

Let me remind you all, and mention to others, that back in high school the only thing or person that mattered to me, was "Eddie"...  and because he wasn't part of this click or the other... and was loved by all, he did his things his way... He was the air I breathed... even the teachers knew!  LOL!  Anyways, it was too much for my parents to handle, so my mother sent me to Perú.  I had been told that I was going for a two week vacation, then once I got there my return ticket hidden from me, and finally found it in time for the senior prom, a year and a half later.  (There are more details to this chapter in my life, I just have to get the courage to share it with you.)

The point is that, the great thing about my night was that I really didn't feel out of place.  I felt as if I belonged.

You see, I was always the new kid in school.  After my parents divorced, we moved around so much... that by the time I was in high school, I had gone to thirteen different schools.  Not only that, but we even moved during junior high, still in the valley, but... well, just to clue you in, only 5 kids from my junior high went to my high school.  So, once again, the last school I go to, again, I come in and have to meet and make new friends, trying to fit in... and then most of the kids, well some had gone to school together since first grade, others maybe later, but anyway you sliced it, I always felt like the "odd man out." 

Last night was amazing!!  I re-connected with such amazing friends from the past, and discovered that we all look fabulous for being 38!!  After all 48 IS THE NEW 38!!  Or at least this is what my generation is telling ourselves!  LOL!!!  

Seriously, we came to the consensus last night that our parents were much OLDER at our age... They weren't as involved in our lives, as we are in our own children's lives.  Most of us were allowed to leave the house in the morning, and personally, my brother, sister and I, always listened for my dad's whistle for when it was time to come home... by then it was already dinner time.

Today, well we drive our kids to school... we're scuba diving, boxing, working out, going on 5k runs... etc.  I wonder how our children, will be with their's... and what they will think of us.  Especially since most of them from eighteen to twenty-four already think we are ancient!  Can't wait to see what they think when they themselves are thirty!!

There are some givens in life that no amount of positive thinking can change. Aging is a fact of life. The wisest approach is to accept and enjoy the ride.  author unknown

Blessings to all!!

313 days to go.

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent. 

Day 39 ~ What is a Friend?

Courtesy of Bing images

Mirriam-Webster defines a friend as one attached to another by affection or esteem.  I can go on further by stating that a friend is someone who is there through the "good", the "bad" and the "ugly", without question. A friend can agree to disagree without a second thought.  A friend remains a friend through adversity.  A friend can pick up right from where you left off without reason.  A friend takes the time to listen despite a lack of interest.  A  friend  remains loyal and true to the core.

I have had so call "friends" come and go, and maybe that's good.  Why?  Well, it has helped me focus on those who I matter to, and those who matter to me.  In other words, maybe they weren't my "friends" to begin with.

Don't get me wrong, doesn't mean it didn't sting.  I have had people call themselves my "friend" and then have had them judge me for who I am, what I do or even where I live!  Or some that just do not have the same values and principles as me, meaning they didn't have any, and then stick their nose up in the air to me.

I met someone this past year and we CLICKED!  And, most of you know that "clicking" with someone does not easily happen.  It had been such a long time since that feeling, that I was literally walking on cloud nine!  We had so much in common too!  We had been friends for seven months when I had invited her to my home... I made her a birthday lunch.  We had what I thought was a nice time. 


However, as weeks went on I noticed she was not calling me like she used to. She wasn't texting me as she used to, etc.  Calley had started getting sick (again), so my focus was elsewhere.  I only noticed this change when others came up to me and in conversation, share the good times they were having together.

I didn't want to jump to any conclusions, but as even more time went on, I observed.  I saw that she was calling others, going out to lunch with others, etc. Those others, well the ladies drove a better car, lived in a nicer home, and their husbands were all professionals, doctors and so forth.  

Or how about the person that calls themselves your friend, yet at the sight of adversity all of a sudden does not respond to your emails or comments!  Not much of a friend I would have to say!  I would never do that to you.

Well, I have two things to say to you... first, is that I hope you never get a "friend" such as yourself! and final thing... ALL OF THIS...  IN A BALLOON... and GONE! 

Courtesy of Bing images

I do not need to prove myself, let alone explain why my family and I are in the position we are in now.  They can either take me and my family or leave us.... as far as I am concerned I do not need friends like that.  But it does not mean that it did not hurt!

Does this mean I should be more careful as to who I befriend?  Should I have to?  My mother would always tell me not to trust anyone that calls themselves my friend.  I never could, and never will be like that... if that was the case then I would be alone without camaraderie.  What a lonely life that would be.  And I am not implying that this is the case for my other either.

Well, maybe I should not wear my heart on my sleeve and put a wall up!

NO!! I will not!!


Happy place.

Courtesy of Bing images

What I will do though, is continue being the happy person that I am becoming, putting all of that behind me. Continue to be the friend that I am. [Show and teach my daughter to be the same.]  I am a great person. Sure I have had my ups and downs.. more downs than anything... and I will no longer let that affect who I am. (if you were my friend you would understand what I have gone through and not turn your back away on me.)
BUT NO MORE I TELL YOU, NO MORE!!!


THIS IS MY LIFE AND I'M TAKING IT BACK!!

I am a great person, with wonderful values, virtues, and principles.  I love laughing, and crying.  I am a passionate person.  I love with my entire being!  And can get angry with just as much.  I am sometimes too honest to a fault.  Regardless, I am very trustworthy!  I am devoted, compassionate, dependable, thoughtful and supportive.  I will fight for my friends and make time for them.  More importantly, I am a loyal friend  and will always stand by you, MY FRIEND!

So if you do not like my car, my house or what I am wearing.... WELL POO ON YOU!!  I can care less what you think, because obviously you are not my friend to begin with... and quite frankly I can do better.  I have better!  

Courtesy of Bing images

The friends I do have all know this about me, and love me unconditionally.  I know this.  Why, well.. after all I have been through, they are still my friends.

I love you all so much for always being there for me, for forgiving my attitude at times, and for understanding me.  You will be my friend until we are old and gray!!

My friends are ALL on my "Dream Team"!

The next time someone deletes you as a “friend”, ask yourself, were they really a friend?

I will not put myself on the "clearance rack" for anyone!

 You can always tell a real friend:  when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.  ~Laurence J. Peter

 Friends are kisses blown to us by angels.  ~Author Unknown

 Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.  ~Robert Brault

Blessings to all!

326 days to go.

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.