Day 39 ~ What is a Friend?

Courtesy of Bing images

Mirriam-Webster defines a friend as one attached to another by affection or esteem.  I can go on further by stating that a friend is someone who is there through the "good", the "bad" and the "ugly", without question. A friend can agree to disagree without a second thought.  A friend remains a friend through adversity.  A friend can pick up right from where you left off without reason.  A friend takes the time to listen despite a lack of interest.  A  friend  remains loyal and true to the core.

I have had so call "friends" come and go, and maybe that's good.  Why?  Well, it has helped me focus on those who I matter to, and those who matter to me.  In other words, maybe they weren't my "friends" to begin with.

Don't get me wrong, doesn't mean it didn't sting.  I have had people call themselves my "friend" and then have had them judge me for who I am, what I do or even where I live!  Or some that just do not have the same values and principles as me, meaning they didn't have any, and then stick their nose up in the air to me.

I met someone this past year and we CLICKED!  And, most of you know that "clicking" with someone does not easily happen.  It had been such a long time since that feeling, that I was literally walking on cloud nine!  We had so much in common too!  We had been friends for seven months when I had invited her to my home... I made her a birthday lunch.  We had what I thought was a nice time. 


However, as weeks went on I noticed she was not calling me like she used to. She wasn't texting me as she used to, etc.  Calley had started getting sick (again), so my focus was elsewhere.  I only noticed this change when others came up to me and in conversation, share the good times they were having together.

I didn't want to jump to any conclusions, but as even more time went on, I observed.  I saw that she was calling others, going out to lunch with others, etc. Those others, well the ladies drove a better car, lived in a nicer home, and their husbands were all professionals, doctors and so forth.  

Or how about the person that calls themselves your friend, yet at the sight of adversity all of a sudden does not respond to your emails or comments!  Not much of a friend I would have to say!  I would never do that to you.

Well, I have two things to say to you... first, is that I hope you never get a "friend" such as yourself! and final thing... ALL OF THIS...  IN A BALLOON... and GONE! 

Courtesy of Bing images

I do not need to prove myself, let alone explain why my family and I are in the position we are in now.  They can either take me and my family or leave us.... as far as I am concerned I do not need friends like that.  But it does not mean that it did not hurt!

Does this mean I should be more careful as to who I befriend?  Should I have to?  My mother would always tell me not to trust anyone that calls themselves my friend.  I never could, and never will be like that... if that was the case then I would be alone without camaraderie.  What a lonely life that would be.  And I am not implying that this is the case for my other either.

Well, maybe I should not wear my heart on my sleeve and put a wall up!

NO!! I will not!!


Happy place.

Courtesy of Bing images

What I will do though, is continue being the happy person that I am becoming, putting all of that behind me. Continue to be the friend that I am. [Show and teach my daughter to be the same.]  I am a great person. Sure I have had my ups and downs.. more downs than anything... and I will no longer let that affect who I am. (if you were my friend you would understand what I have gone through and not turn your back away on me.)
BUT NO MORE I TELL YOU, NO MORE!!!


THIS IS MY LIFE AND I'M TAKING IT BACK!!

I am a great person, with wonderful values, virtues, and principles.  I love laughing, and crying.  I am a passionate person.  I love with my entire being!  And can get angry with just as much.  I am sometimes too honest to a fault.  Regardless, I am very trustworthy!  I am devoted, compassionate, dependable, thoughtful and supportive.  I will fight for my friends and make time for them.  More importantly, I am a loyal friend  and will always stand by you, MY FRIEND!

So if you do not like my car, my house or what I am wearing.... WELL POO ON YOU!!  I can care less what you think, because obviously you are not my friend to begin with... and quite frankly I can do better.  I have better!  

Courtesy of Bing images

The friends I do have all know this about me, and love me unconditionally.  I know this.  Why, well.. after all I have been through, they are still my friends.

I love you all so much for always being there for me, for forgiving my attitude at times, and for understanding me.  You will be my friend until we are old and gray!!

My friends are ALL on my "Dream Team"!

The next time someone deletes you as a “friend”, ask yourself, were they really a friend?

I will not put myself on the "clearance rack" for anyone!

 You can always tell a real friend:  when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.  ~Laurence J. Peter

 Friends are kisses blown to us by angels.  ~Author Unknown

 Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.  ~Robert Brault

Blessings to all!

326 days to go.

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.

Day 31 ~ The Blackberry Bandit... Will She Get Away With It?

Courtesy of Bing images

The other day, Dean and I were kicking back, chill-axing as I like to say (chilling and relaxing,) talking, and somehow we ended up on the subject of my stolen Blackberry.  I was giving him an update on my Blackberry Blunder...... I had spoken to the detective assigned to my theft report, and he was going to look into it more and get back to me.  I can not give up on this 23 year old and give her the go ahead to mess up her life even more.  She needs to learn that you do not steal.  Then all of a sudden... Dean puts the brakes on!!!

What?!  

Well, Dino was a little apprehensive to tell me because he knows how wrong this is and how we need to follow through.  So, he  proceeds to tell me that he has mixed feelings about my going forward with filing charges against Merit Velasco for the theft of my Blackberry (- RIGHT OUT OF MY PURSE!!)

You see we have Calley to think about.  It appears that Merit does not have good influence from her family and friends, let alone have "good" friends and we do not know her one bit... After all, she does have both her father and brother in jail... What if she seeks revenge upon us and sicks her family and friends on us... This situation is horrible, I hate the thought of backing off.  I do not want us to be looking over our shoulders and especially with Calley... This upsets me because this is precisely the reason why people back out of filing charges against thieves and violators... because they feel threatened in some way or in fear for their family and children... and if it wasn't for Calley...

Oh my G!! I could not believe what I was hearing... I could literally feel my temperature rising... and then I put the brakes on me!!! 

It wasn't that I did not agree with Dean... I did!!  BUT, what was infuriating me, was the fact that this girl was going to get away with stealing from us.  It is no wonder why our society is falling apart!!  This totally SUCKS!!  There I said It!!

Courtesy of Bing images

Let me ask you...  What would you do?  Do I back off?  Do I let evil once again win?!

One thing is for sure... I am going to communicate this to the detective and see what he says... and go from there.  I doubt very seriously that we will be put in a "safe house" or in "protective custody", let alone have a "squad car" parked in front of our house... right!  for a Blackberry?  Seriously now, I doubt it very much.  LMBO! (laughing my butt off for the "internet slang challenged")  

but if it happens after sunrise, the defender is guilty of bloodshed. “Anyone who steals must certainly make restitution, but if they have nothing, they must be sold to pay for their theft. Exodus 22:3

Blessings to all!

334 days to go.

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.

Day 19 ~ Learning The Hard Way

Alright I just got sucked into "The Bachelorette" on ABC once again... Oh brother!!  There are times that I just want to jump into the television and scream at Ashley!  I was so happy when "that" Bentley left... WHAT A JERK!!!  (Must be his way for getting back at his mother naming him that!)  

Honestly, I think we (all us dolls) have had a "Bentley" in our lives at one point or another.  I know I can say that I have had my share.  Yes, you think I would have learned after the first... BUT NOOOOO... I was a glutton for punishment.

I think my lowest point was when I dated a twenty-two year old, when I was thirty-seven.  I would allow this USER to borrow my new car, and little did I know that he was using it to date another girl!  I FINALLY believed my friends and confront him.  Oh he denied it, and then was out the next night again with this girl!  Oh yeah this guy knew what to say when, and I would fall for it every time.

Courtesy of Bing images

I was such an IDIOT!!  All because I wanted to be happy and find true love!  Oh and my friends.. Oh they were warning me... but did I listen?  NOOOOO 

It finally took two thousand dollars, humiliation, embarrassment, and eventually loosing my job (because I was just not focusing where I needed to!) and I made an IDIOT out of myself!  And what's worse is, that I allowed this mere boy around my boys.  I was such a FOOL! 

Thank god my friends did not give up on me!  They were warning me left and right... and I did not believe them.  I believed him each and every time.  He would tell me that they were jealous. HA! What was more stupid was that I cried when I knew HE HAD TO GO!  OH BROTHER!

So, I guess we all have a little Ashley in us all, and we all learn the hard way.  But that does not mean it will always be like that.  With each "Bentley"  that has come into my life, I have wised up that much more! 

I am blessed to have Dean in my life.  We of course have our ups and downs, as any marriage does... BUT I WOULD NOT TRADE HIM IN FOR THE WORLD!!

I hope that Ashley finds her "Dean"!

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.         1 Corinthians 10:13

Blessings to all!


346 days to go.

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied without written permission from Carla B Karam- please just ask. All views and feelings are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.

Day 14! ~ [Learning to] Letting the Chips Fall Where They May!

Today I took the let the chips fall where they may approach and left EVERYTHING in God's hands.  I learned a long, long time ago that I can not "control" the actions of others.  However, there is nothing wrong with fighting for what is yours, what you believe in or WHAT IS RIGHT!!  

I know, I was getting just a little obsessive with teaching a twenty-three year old the meaning of respecting the property of others.  However, as the day progressed the messages were coming in, slowly but surely...  and from her own family and friends.  As I read each one, the message was more or less the same... she will not give me the phone back, she did what she wanted, and no one stopped her.  

I do want to say that my efforts yesterday did not go unwarranted!  Out of the forty-nine (yes, forty-nine!) people that I contacted, I received responses from five people!  I can say that my faith in people continues to grow!  These people felt bad that their friend/family member had done what she did.  One person even told me that she would speak to her.  Well, we'll see... I won't hold my breath.  

Several of my friends suggested that I leave it to the police... I could have, they're right... BUT I had to do something about it!  Honestly, I didn't even think twice about it!  The next thing I knew I was really finding things out... it was all falling into my lap!

Then again, maybe you do not agree with what I am doing... Well.. Let me share something with you... 

Nearly three years ago, my husband and I, after seeing that the job market in Los Angeles was not panning out, we decided it would be best to start over in El Paso, Texas  [where his dad and his family lives- YES, babysitters!! just kidding ;) ]. after loosing his twenty-six year job, and needless to say its been tough getting to where we are today;  I am a [part-time] computer teacher at a small school, who is now on summer break (no pay).  and...we Thank God we were able to manage with my only working part-time.  


As things went on, my little girl missed sixty-two days of school this year because of asthma and respiratory problems due to environmental allergies (this year worse than last);  my husband, Thank God was also hired by the same school that employs me and teaches Calley~ kinda nice arrangement, huh?...  are you kidding?  No, that's not what I mean, It's cool all of us being there at one time or another.  But, seriously, life s a constant struggle... but who's complaining  ;)

With all that "said"... I also want to share with you that it took me nearly ten months to save for my phone!! Which also has a cool cover and a 8gb micro-sd card in it!  $350!! worth of savings down the toilet! NOT!!... so somehow I am compelled to get it back.

courtesy of Bing images

As I sit back and read what I have written so far... I have found IRONY in all of this... Irony?  you ask?... well the irony is that here I am basically fighting to get my phone back, and trying to teach a twenty-three year old a lesson in life ... and here I can't even have a relationship with my own son who is twenty-three years old, let alone teach him a lesson in life.

Irony, I tell you, Irony!

Did someone say something about chips or Leaving it to God?  I think that's a wonderful idea... as always I say a prayer for my sons and once again I will leave my relationship with my boys in His hands.  

By the way... IT'S BEEN FOURTEEN DAYS!!!  Love this "blogging" thing!

Blessings to all!

351 days / 50 weeks to go!!    

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied.  All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life.  Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.

Day 12 ~ Did I Make It? or Did I Mess My Goal Up?

Oh my gosh the last twenty-four hours have been weighing very heavy on me... I think I was handling Father's Day pretty good and then I discovered my blackberry missing.

After getting home from a long day of celebrating all the great dads that are in our family, I discovered that I couldn't find my phone.  I exhausted all avenues, looked high and low, dumped out my purse, called the grocery store and the pizza place... did it three times and then I had Dean look... we had nothing!  No one had seen or had turned in my phone.

Both Dean and I were calling my phone and nothing.  Then I decided to go online and check out if there had been any activity on my account... and viola!!  Two numbers I did not recognize on my account, phone calls and messages sent during the time I had been celebrating Father's Day and could not have used my phone.  I felt so violated!

I called my mobile carrier to confirm my findings, and to find out about the insurance on my phone... and I was right!  I'll have to wait to do something about the insurance on the phone, but for now I did shut it off, and reported it stolen!

Nonetheless all the unexpected CSI work took up time... next thing I knew I only had two hours to get in my Father's Day post on my blog before the day was over.  Without a second thought I immediately began on my blog... however, as I was writing I had a brilliant idea to text and call the numbers that were contacted.

Imagine this... time winding down to midnight and I received a response back from a young lady that knows who took my phone.  She began to tell me that the girl who had my phone was in her twenties and asked for her to lie to me. Let's call her Jane... Jane then told me that she was talking to me because I was being polite and she felt bad for me.

Talk about multi-tasking, I was trying to finish editing my blog and tug at Jane's heart all at the same time.  I was hoping to befriend Jane so she would get my phone back for me.  Only time will tell if it worked.

courtesy of Bing images

First thing this morning I even offered to buy Jane and her friend lunch if they would return my phone "back to the scene of the crime," the pizza place.  Well the day is now more than half over and I have not given up hope.

Now as to my blog last night... not only was it a heavy subject matter, [Father's Day], and at the same time dealing with getting my phone back, but then when I finally hit PUBLISH POST the time had changed to midnight.  So did I make my post in time??? It officially posted Monday at 0:00 ...

My goal is to blog everyday for 365 days, did I totally mess it up last night by not getting it in by 11:59pm?  Well for as much as I feel as I may have failed... the perfectionist in me...  I am not going to give up that easy! ... the fighter in me!!

Blessings to all.

353 days to go!


All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.