Day 517 ~ My Husband, Mr. Integrity (XXIX)

Day 29 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

"A prudent man forsees evil, and hides himself; the simple pass on, and are punished." (Proverbs 27:12) 

You're moving toward the home stretch of your 30-day challenge! Just a reminder of what you've committed: 

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

As you near the end of your Encouragement Challenge, take time to think about your husband's responses to the wickedness of the culture, the media, etc. Does your husband recognize and avoid evil? Does he regularly turn his back on pornography, sexual temptations, and the urge to lie and cheat?

This is a valuable character trait. Like Joseph in the Old Testament, who fled from the wicked advances of Potiphar's wife, this takes an understanding that these kinds of sins are first and foremost, sins against God (Gen. 39:9).

Praise your husband when he recognizes and turns his back on wickedness. If you can think of a circumstance where your husband stood for righteousness, remind him of that today-and express your gratitude. 

Day 29! . . .
I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

From the first day I met my husband I have seen the type of man he is.  He has shown me early on in our relationship how honest he is.

What really sticks in my mind that he not only has found one wallet (full of money, credit cards and even an endorsed paycheck) in our time together, but he has found three!  Each and every time he literally went out of his way to return it to its rightful owner, and has denied any reward offered!

Amazing, huh?!

He isn't just about returning wallets... he has always stood up and helped the underdog and has even gone to battle for them... since he was a boy too.  If he saw someone being picked on, he stood up for them.  He even went as far as fighting the school's biggest bully not caring about his own safety.  He won everyone's respect in his school.

Sooo... I tell you... not only do I feel blessed because Dean IS MY husband and soul mate... I am also blessed that he IS a man of INTEGRITY...  Thank you Lord for not only bringing a man into my life who loves me, but one that is honest, sincere and has integrity!

I am thankful for my husband!

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 454 ~ Let's Have A Good Clean Fight

Last week the Republicans had the floor as they spoke at their National Convention... tearing down anything that our current President, Barrack Obama, has spoken of, touched upon or believed in.

This week... the Democrats have the floor at their National Convention.  Politicians and "special" people alike stand up in his, President Obama's defense, tearing down anything that Mitt Romney followers had to say.

Throughout the year we find many walks of life here in the United States on opposite sides of the fence when it comes to different sporting events... people yelling and cheering for their home teams... people easily putting down and shunning anyone who wears anything but their own colors.

We have gangs battling in low-income neighborhoods.  We even have foreign bullets coming across our borders.  

We man our airports and our borders all against foreign enemies.

We protect our homes, our properties and even our identities from enemies.

We protect our family and our children from harm and "the bad guy."

We go as far as praying in our churches as we worship for the safety of our land.

We need to protect our land... our United States.

Why is it that people who "we" elect to look out for our safety attack their opponents for wanting and or doing the same thing that they do but only a little different?

After all, don't both the Republicans and Democrats want the same thing?  A safe country, a successful country, a country we can all be proud of?

Then why do "some" parties have to get so ugly?  They act no better than bullies do.

What are we teaching our children?

Obama is a socialist!

Romney is a bully!

I know competition is {supposed to be} healthy... but do we have to display such "bullying" tactics? 

What are we teaching our children?

I guess this is what politics is about.  But does it have to be?

Having voted for both GOP and Democratic candidates in my life... having been both a  registered Republican, and a registered Democrat in my life... 

I have come to my own conclusions... I guess it is the rebel in me - wink, wink.

After hearing so many promises {over the years}... to realize they were only broken promises... so much flipping... so much flopping... so much... rhetoric... 

I march by my own drum-beat... I am making my own choices... I make my own decisions... 

I believe that actions speak louder than words... I believe in fighting fair... {and} being kind to one another!

What do ref's say before a fight?  

Let's have a good clean fight.

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. ³² Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. ~ Ephesians 4:31-32 (NIV)

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 344 ~ This Is Why I Share My Life...

I would like to start off by saying that by no means, by my sharing my "story", my feelings, thoughts and experiences, am I doing so to have people feel sorry for me.  I am not insinuating that anyone has either.  wink, wink.

My feelings and what I go through is due to things that were set in motion many years ago, by choices I made.  This is why we should not take having children lightly... meaning think things through... plan them out before you carry your decisions out.

I am not saying that I regret any of my decisions... I am saying I would have handle things a little bit different.  Bite the bullet so to speak.

I've shared with you before, and it is also on my "About my Blog" page, I share all of me for when the day comes that my sons or daughter, family or friends, want to know me a little more or are trying to understand why I tick the way I do... well here's my handbook!  Hahaha!

Yeah! I'm so complicated that I need a handbook!  Hysterical!  I never thought about it that way. Hahaha  still can't stop laughing...

No... but seriously... I just wanted to leave my kids "my side of the story"... for whenever they were ready to learn about me.

Also... If I can help someone feel less alone... if my experiences help them in any way... or if they need a friend... well I sincerely hope I can help.  I felt so alone going through a lot of my life, especially with my parents not really being around.  

I won't lie to you... I am still picking myself up from my "down time" hahaha - that's a new way of looking at it.  and it is not easy... but I am doing it.

I am not claiming that I am some super hero, although I have been told most of my life that I looked like Wonder Woman ~ Linda Carter.  Not saying that I did or anything, but there was a resemblance- I too am a brunette with blue eyes, so I'm sure that's part of it... you decide.

I know it's not the best picture of me to compare it with Linda Carter/Wonder Woman... but you get the idea  ;) wink, wink. (This is a picture of me in beauty school circa 1982- I can't believe that its been thirty years!)

As I was saying, it's not that I am a Wonder Woman (hee, hee)... I know that I have dealt with depression most, if not all of my life (I can remember dealing with sadness as early as six and seven years old  anyways), I have gone to therapy and been on anti-depressants... 

However I personally feel that I would like to handle this naturally, and have chosen to deal with my issues and get over them. Ha! If only it was as easy as I made it sound.

Oh and by the way... I am not saying that everyone, anyone, you or anyone you know should handle grief, sadness or issues the way I am.  Not a psychiatrist, therapist or anything.  

I read, watch Oprah (hahaha sounds silly but I have learned a lot from her), read some more, talk to my besties and my family, use logic and my faith in God.  Oh and how can I forget, I blog too.

All these things are my tools for healing and living a meaningful life.  A life I will be proud of.  A woman my husband, children, family and friends would be proud of.  

I want to leave my children knowledge, compassion, honesty, integrity, tenderness and love. 

I want to help someone not have to ever feel even one tenth of the pain I have felt in my life.  

I want to help put a smile on someone's heart.

This is why I share my life.

A smile is the light in your window that tells others that there is a caring, sharing person inside.
~Denis Waitley

(here's to you finding your...)

 Peace,  

21 days to go...  {I can't believe it, really I can't}  

read about this count down in my "About my Blog" page

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Taking Back My Life ~ Making It My Own.  U.S Copyright laws apply.  © 2012 

Day 144 ~ Proud Not To Be Perfect

I don't know why I feel compelled to write and tell you this, but I will go with it... 

Kurt Cobain

I am not perfect.  I continue to have good days, keeping in mind that not too long ago I had my share of bad ones too.  I treat others as I would like to be treated, and I apologize as soon as I discover I failed.  I have made my share of mistakes and have had my own bouts with drugs.  But no matter what, one thing is for sure...  I do what I say and I say the truth.

I have my family's best interest in mind, as well as putting their needs ahead of my own.  I am a perfectionist and am a true believer that there is a place for everything and everything has its place.  I continue to work on the fact that sometimes things do not go as planned.  I do better at spontaneity, even though, at heart I am a planner.

I am a loyal friend through and through, however I do not go against my own values or beliefs for anyone, even you.

With all my imperfections, I am no one to judge you.

Who are you to judge the life I live?  I know I'm not perfect and I don't live to be.  But before you start pointing fingers, make sure your hands are clean.  ~ Bob Marley

Blessings to all!!

221 days to go...


All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.

Day 50 ~ A Mother's Love Part Deux

Courtesy of Bing images

As mentioned in earlier postings, once I put a subject "in a balloon and let it go"... that's it, I am letting it go and moving on with my life in a positive way.

However, my posting last night A Mother's Love, apparently struck a nerve with my cousin Gloria.  She came to my mother's defense with both barrels loaded.

First of all, I appreciate the fact that she has had such a wonderful relationship with my mother, apparently everyone has, except for her own children.  After all my mother has helped her and the rest of her family get either citizenship or green cards here in the US, among other things.

She stated that I had a "selective memory" as to what has happened in my mother's life and that she's a 73 year old woman that has OCD, and has suffered post-partum depression and was hospitalized for it something all together different (it was 1970, and they had no clue about PPD back then).  First of all ... she is 71.  Secondly, I did touch on this subject a little in Day 11.  Finally, how dare you tell me what I remember is not right and to ask your dad... I was there, I do not have to ask anyone.

As part of my reply to my cousin I had said for her to walk a mile in my shoes... well here are a few more steps for you to walk in...

Imagine yourself being nine years old, we lived in the heart of Hollywood, and it was 1972,  It was around ten o'clock at night and my mother, brother, sister and I were out on Hollywood Boulevard... before I knew it... they were no where in sight!! She was gone, and I found myself all alone avoiding strangers... She had gone home, she didn't look for me... I had to call my father collect to come get me.

I am not trying to bash my mother, nor disrespect the memory of my father.  I am trying to heal and become a better person, so I do not repeat the mistakes my parents made.

I am writing this blog so that my children one day understand what I have been through, so that they can understand and know the truth.  My truths, my experiences, my downfalls and my successes without ever having a doubt of who I am and how much I love them.  My intent is not to hurt anyone, but as mentioned to heal.  With that said if you do not like what I write, well quite frankly, it is MY LIFE and WHAT I EXPERIENCE... It is my TRUTHS of what I have SEEN.  Furthermore, do you think I have enjoyed walking in my shoes?  

People who have lived beautiful lives and have felt the unconditional love from their parents may find this hard to believe... well I'm sorry, but not everyone has lived a "perfect life" or felt that "unconditional love".  

I mentioned last night that it saddens me that I do not share the same love for my mother that my friends or even cousins have for their mothers... This does not make me happy.  I am not passing "judgement" on my mother, so you do not have to quote scriptures to me in such an ugly way...  this hurts!    Being that I can not change any of that... I have to PUT IT IN A BALLOON & LET IT GO for my family's sake.  For my sake... I have to move forward and raise my daughter, love her as I would have wanted to experience myself.  

So shame on you Gloria, for you being so quick to pass "judgement" on me.  You weren't even born yet when any of this was happening to my family.  You came so quickly to my mother's defense... did you even really read my post?  Anyways, I'm sure that you will now follow suit like the rest of the family... for what they are known for, they stop talking to you when they do not like you or what you do and then talk behind your back.  If that's the case, and that is how you feel, it is a shame.  I thought you were smarter than that... especially since you are an "MD"!  

I myself, may not be an MD, but I certainly do not operate that way.  I talk about things, I solve them or agree to disagree.  I do not pass judgement on others, Lord knows I am not perfect.  I unfortunately am a product of my parent's actions or non-actions...  and It stops here!!  It is all up in a balloon and gone, flown away!  Now... to be the best wife to my husband, and above all be the bestest mother my children can ask for!! 

“Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible — the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.”  - Virginia Satir

 “One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: that word is love.”  Sophocles

Blessings to all!!

315 days to go.

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent. 

Day 39 ~ What is a Friend?

Courtesy of Bing images

Mirriam-Webster defines a friend as one attached to another by affection or esteem.  I can go on further by stating that a friend is someone who is there through the "good", the "bad" and the "ugly", without question. A friend can agree to disagree without a second thought.  A friend remains a friend through adversity.  A friend can pick up right from where you left off without reason.  A friend takes the time to listen despite a lack of interest.  A  friend  remains loyal and true to the core.

I have had so call "friends" come and go, and maybe that's good.  Why?  Well, it has helped me focus on those who I matter to, and those who matter to me.  In other words, maybe they weren't my "friends" to begin with.

Don't get me wrong, doesn't mean it didn't sting.  I have had people call themselves my "friend" and then have had them judge me for who I am, what I do or even where I live!  Or some that just do not have the same values and principles as me, meaning they didn't have any, and then stick their nose up in the air to me.

I met someone this past year and we CLICKED!  And, most of you know that "clicking" with someone does not easily happen.  It had been such a long time since that feeling, that I was literally walking on cloud nine!  We had so much in common too!  We had been friends for seven months when I had invited her to my home... I made her a birthday lunch.  We had what I thought was a nice time. 


However, as weeks went on I noticed she was not calling me like she used to. She wasn't texting me as she used to, etc.  Calley had started getting sick (again), so my focus was elsewhere.  I only noticed this change when others came up to me and in conversation, share the good times they were having together.

I didn't want to jump to any conclusions, but as even more time went on, I observed.  I saw that she was calling others, going out to lunch with others, etc. Those others, well the ladies drove a better car, lived in a nicer home, and their husbands were all professionals, doctors and so forth.  

Or how about the person that calls themselves your friend, yet at the sight of adversity all of a sudden does not respond to your emails or comments!  Not much of a friend I would have to say!  I would never do that to you.

Well, I have two things to say to you... first, is that I hope you never get a "friend" such as yourself! and final thing... ALL OF THIS...  IN A BALLOON... and GONE! 

Courtesy of Bing images

I do not need to prove myself, let alone explain why my family and I are in the position we are in now.  They can either take me and my family or leave us.... as far as I am concerned I do not need friends like that.  But it does not mean that it did not hurt!

Does this mean I should be more careful as to who I befriend?  Should I have to?  My mother would always tell me not to trust anyone that calls themselves my friend.  I never could, and never will be like that... if that was the case then I would be alone without camaraderie.  What a lonely life that would be.  And I am not implying that this is the case for my other either.

Well, maybe I should not wear my heart on my sleeve and put a wall up!

NO!! I will not!!


Happy place.

Courtesy of Bing images

What I will do though, is continue being the happy person that I am becoming, putting all of that behind me. Continue to be the friend that I am. [Show and teach my daughter to be the same.]  I am a great person. Sure I have had my ups and downs.. more downs than anything... and I will no longer let that affect who I am. (if you were my friend you would understand what I have gone through and not turn your back away on me.)
BUT NO MORE I TELL YOU, NO MORE!!!


THIS IS MY LIFE AND I'M TAKING IT BACK!!

I am a great person, with wonderful values, virtues, and principles.  I love laughing, and crying.  I am a passionate person.  I love with my entire being!  And can get angry with just as much.  I am sometimes too honest to a fault.  Regardless, I am very trustworthy!  I am devoted, compassionate, dependable, thoughtful and supportive.  I will fight for my friends and make time for them.  More importantly, I am a loyal friend  and will always stand by you, MY FRIEND!

So if you do not like my car, my house or what I am wearing.... WELL POO ON YOU!!  I can care less what you think, because obviously you are not my friend to begin with... and quite frankly I can do better.  I have better!  

Courtesy of Bing images

The friends I do have all know this about me, and love me unconditionally.  I know this.  Why, well.. after all I have been through, they are still my friends.

I love you all so much for always being there for me, for forgiving my attitude at times, and for understanding me.  You will be my friend until we are old and gray!!

My friends are ALL on my "Dream Team"!

The next time someone deletes you as a “friend”, ask yourself, were they really a friend?

I will not put myself on the "clearance rack" for anyone!

 You can always tell a real friend:  when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.  ~Laurence J. Peter

 Friends are kisses blown to us by angels.  ~Author Unknown

 Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.  ~Robert Brault

Blessings to all!

326 days to go.

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.