Day 536 ~ What's Next? . . . In the Near Distance

Sooooo . . . At the bottom of my more recent posts I have left you a teaser per say- "What's coming up?   Hmmm.... I think I see another challenge off in the near distance. "

So here are the details.  

On June 19th I started to write about a challenge I was participating in... "I Am Second 22 Day Challenge" . . . a life altering challenge.

In October I was contacted by Doug Bender (Doug is part of the I Am Second movement and has shared part of his life's struggles and how he discovered God- you can click on his name to find out more about him).  Doug had read my blog and saw that I shared my challenge on my blog.

Doug shared with me that he wrote a book for the I Am Second movement and it is being published- Live Second: 365 Ways to Make Jesus First   The book will be available at all books stores and online week of December 9th.

Doug asked me to read and blog about this book that same week.

After reading what I have written thus far, I see that this is not a challenge, nor is it a review-  I'll be writing four posts that week, sharing my thoughts, experiences and how I Am Second.

As cheesy as this may sound, I am honored to have been asked to do this.

Thank you Doug for reading my blog and asking me to participate.  I am looking forward to it.

I am thankful for good books!!


What's coming up?   Hmmm.... 
I think I see another challenge off in the near distance. . . December 9th - 15th

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 510 ~ Kindness, A Substitution for Anger (XXIII)

Day 23 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

"Let your speech always be with grace." (Collosians 4:6a) 

You're moving toward the home stretch of your 30-day challenge! Just a reminder of what you've committed: 

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

"In all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works..."  (Titus 2:7a)

Does the "30-Day Encouragement Challenge" seem like hard work? Or is it becoming a pleasant exercise in genuine Christ-likeness in your home? You are only scratching the surface of ways to encourage your mate. Is your husband organized? Is he diligent? Is he persistent? These are all related to a pattern of personal disciplines that are worthy of your praise. Affirm him for one or more of these traits that you see in him.

Some men have not developed these qualities because they are naturally more spontaneous. You can praise his spontaneity! Perhaps God has called you alongside to help him with disciplines he has not yet developed - but this does not include nagging. You can keep him organized.

Whatever the need, you can be your husband's cheerleader, encouraging him when he wants to give up.

Day 23 ! . . .
I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

"Kindness..." {. . .  is so tough at a time of anger that two days are needed to cover this subject!"}

Being kind with your words even if you are upset is the hardest thing to do!  Try it.  I have.

The great lesson that I have learned through this challenge has become easier and easier... or  rather yet in the neighborhood of being second nature.

Additionally I have learned that being kind through the course of a disagreement is a whole lot better than getting upset.  Your point comes across clearer.   And the end result being more pleasant.

Our home is calmer.  Peaceful.

Now. This is not to say that I have not gotten uber angry, because I have.  It is just the way I express my anger.  [which at first was very challenging]

Being angry and trying to find kind words to express yourself is an art.  To sit and sort through your feelings and then translate them to kind words is soothing in itself.  Even funny at times.  

More importantly is the way my husband is responding.  What once seemed to be the act of pulling teeth... has now become a day at the candy store.  If that makes any sense.

Heck... I just try to have a more comical, gentler way of expressing myself.  It sure is more welcomed, that's for sure!

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 506 ~ Right Place, at the Right Time (XIX)

Day 19 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

10  "My beloved us radiant and ruddy, outstanding among ten thousand.  11His head is purest gold;  his hair is wavy and black as raven. 12His eyes are like doves by the water streams, washed in milk, mounted like jewels. 

13His cheeks are like beds of spice y

ielding perfume.  

His lips are like lilies 

dripping with myrrh. 

14His arms are rods of gold 

 set with topaz. 

His body is like polished ivory 

 decorated with lapis lazuli. 

15His legs are pillars of marble s

et on bases of pure gold. 

His appearance is like Lebanon,

 choice as its cedars. 

1. 16His mouth is sweetness itself; 

 he is altogether lovely. 

This is my beloved, this is my friend, 

 daughters of Jerusalem." (Song of Solomon 5:10-16) 

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

Criticism leaves scars; but encouragement can bring healing. Remember that today as you focus on your "30-Day Encouragement Challenge." Almost nothing is as devastating to a man as the belief that his wife finds him repulsive. Sadly, many women unwisely criticize their husbands' bodies.

Have you ever considered how wonderfully God designed men and women? No matter how a man looks—by the standards of the world - a loving God designed them all, and they are all "beautiful" in His sight. Encourage your husband today by praising his uniqueness.

As you look over your husband's body, from the tip of his toes to his bald or bushy head, thank God that your husband is "wonderfully made," then admire your husband verbally. (Strong arms? Hairy chest? Firm hands? Big feet? Rugged chin? Wide shoulders? Compassionate eyes? Broad smile?)

Day 19 ! . . .    

I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

All that and then some!  That's for sure. 

Funny... have you ever wondered what it would have been like if you would have met your loved one years before you did?

Honestly... if my husband and I would have met in high school I really don't think we would have made a connection.  Or would have we?

My husband back in the day was in a band and very much a rocker.  Don't get me wrong... he wasn't a crazy rocker or anything... he just loved playing music.

And I at the time was very much into Prince, Madonna and anything else that you could dance too... including the "Madonna-look-a-like" wardrobe!  Yes!  The big hair, shoulder pads or lack there of, plenty of bracelets and let us not forget all the neon back in the 80s!!

I think we met when we were suppose to meet... wink, wink.  Any other time would have been less than perfect.

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 505 ~ Give Joy, Get Joy! (XVIII)

Day 18 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

"You will show me the path of life.  In your presence is fullness of joy . . . Happy are the people whose God is the Lord!'" (Psalm 16:11a; 144:15b) 

"A merry heart does good like medicine . . ." (Proverbs 17:22a)

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

It's hard to criticize others when we are enjoying their company. Instead of speaking negatively to your husband today, enjoy him! Encourage him! As you experience fullness of joy with God, share some of that joy with your husband. Does your husband have a playful side? A great sense of humor? Is there a "little boy" that wants to escape from time to time, reflecting the joy in his heart? This is a wonderful part of who he is, and a great strength. Let him know that you appreciate his joyfulness and his playful spirit. Find opportunities to join him in positive play times.

If your husband can sometimes be overly serious, coax him out occasionally for some play times. It will help him relieve stress and relax.    

Day 18 ! . . .    

I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

If someone is always nice to you, giving you joy, making you laugh, telling you how great you are... well you very well can't get mad at them ... now can you?

I'd say that it would truly make it difficult.

So give it a try.  

I have.  

If you think about it that's all I've been doing with this challenge... encouraging my husband... telling him how great he is... how much we appreciate him... how thankful we are for him and all he does for us.

There's a bonus to this challenge too... a happy home!!

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 503 ~ Communication Station (XVI)

Day 16 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

"And the Lord God said, 'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.'" (Genesis 2:18) 

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

God says that it is not good for man to be alone. But the way some women criticize their mates, the husbands may long for solitude. Be careful today not to criticize your mate, but look for ways to encourage him personally and publicly.

Speaking of communication, does your husband communicate with you? God has made you a companion and helper for your husband, and part of being "one flesh" with him is the privilege of sharing and discussing personal needs and concerns. Thank God for that wonderful gift. Thank your husband for communicating with you. If your spouse does not communicate as you wish, look for ways that he communicates that are normal for him—smiling at you, nodding his head, even a pleasant "grunt!"—and then thank him for letting you know that he cares. Perhaps he needs to be lovingly taught how to communicate. Be patient with him . . . and listen when he does speak.   

Day 16 ! . . .    

I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

Communication... boy... this can make or break a couple that is for sure!!

I have never had a problem communicating... well let me re-phrase that.  I have never had a problem communicating for others.  Meaning if you are in trouble, I have your back.

Now... when it comes to speaking for myself, I dread confrontations and have no problem speaking of happy things... but when a wrong has been done to me, I have a problem voicing it. I have found it easier just cutting all ties.

I know that isn't healthy on its own, but neither is that feeling of anxiousness or intimidation.

So when it comes to communicating with my husband I do it ever so lovingly... and if by chance I am upset... those have been times when I have written him a letter.

This is not to say that we have not had our moments of "bad" communicating... because we have.  But the important thing about it all is that we have learned from those "bad" moments.

We have had our moments of communication that were far from perfect in our marriage... but nearly 10 years later I would have to say that we love each other more than ever and have a stronger marriage.

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 502 ~ Support EachOther (XV)

Day 15 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

"But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ...." (2Peter 3:18a) 

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

Sometimes we live so close to our spouse that we fail to see him as others do; we only see our husband's faults. But take a step back. Perhaps he is growing spiritually in ways you have failed to appreciate. How can you encourage his growth in a fresh, new way? Remember—your husband is accountable to God for his spiritual development. You are accountable to God to encourage and not hinder that growth.

Can you identify an area of spiritual strength in your husband? Does he pray or read his Bible regularly? Does he like to read about or discuss spiritual matters? Does he go to church with you? Is he a spiritual leader? What do others say about him? If you can identify a specific area, praise him for that. If not, pray earnestly that God will work in his heart, and watch for signs of spiritual growth in the future.  

Day 15 ! . . .    

I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

One thing I must say about my spiritual growth...

My husband has been by my side the entire way!!

I feel so blessed to have a husband that is so supportive.
He cheers for me from the sidelines the enire way.

He has supported my continued involvement in our Church...
He supports my every decision when it comes to the betterment of my psyche...
He even supports me with my decision to start a not for profit corporation to help others.

My husband may not be as involved as I am in my ventures...
However, that does not mean that he is not by my side...
Furthermore, as time goes on and The Blessed Spoon grows and other projects come about...
I am positive that my husband will be by my side,
and more and more involved.

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 501 ~ The Gift of Integrity (XIV)

Day 14 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

"The righteous man walks in his integrity." (Proverbs 20:7a) 

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

Every week there are news reports about men who gave in to temptations and compromised what they said they believed. We hear countless reports about dishonest business dealings, hidden infidelity, and hypocritical leaders. It's so easy to focus on these things and ignore those who are being honest, faithful and genuine. As you continue in the "30-Day Encouragement Challenge," determine to look for ways that your husband stands against the culture.

Is your spouse a man of integrity? Is he fair in his dealings with people? Does he understand the meaning of justice? Is he honest in business? Unhypocritical in his faith? Consider all the ways a man can live in integrity, and praise your husband for one of them. As you have the opportunity—as it is appropriate—share examples of your husband's honesty and integrity with others.

Day 14 ! . . .    

I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

Hands down- my husband is fair, honest and is unhypocritical.  

He sees things justly, and sees the flip side of things as well.

I feel very blessed when it comes to him and the qualities he posseses. 

Today is his birthday. . . Happy Birthday Dino!!  I love you.  

"Just one lifetime won't be enough for us."

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.

Day 497 ~ SImmering Love (X)

Day 10 of the Husband Encouragement Challenge
courtesy of ReviveOurHearts.com

"The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone.  I will make a helper suitable for him." (Genesis 2:18) 

• You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband . . . or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else, about your husband!

We all crave appreciation. We want to know that we are valued and loved. Early love letters probably reflected our admiration, but if we're not careful, our spouse will forget why we were drawn to him. If you still have any of your old love letters, re-read them for clues to deepen your current level of appreciation for your spouse. When we spend time criticizing our husbands, we lose time that could be spent admiring them. As you consider various ways to encourage your husband, ask, "How can I admire him?"

Does your husband know that you think he is attractive? What was one of the characteristics in your husband that first drew you to him? Was it a physical characteristic, or something else?

Was it his gentle, compassionate eyes? Kindness or concern for others? An easy-going confidence? A steadiness that comes from trusting in the Lord? Strength of character in a culture that lacks integrity? Do you see at least a glimpse of that characteristic in him today? Whatever it is, tell him!

Woo Hoo, day 10 ...   

I'm going to keep this simple and not let it get too wordy.  

"You had me at 'hello'"... 


We all remember that famous line from Jerry Maguire... don't you?  wink, wink.

Actually Dino took more than fifteen years to have me at anything!  LOL!... 

When we first met I was married, and he was great friends with my brother.. They played ice hockey together.

It wasn't until fifteen years later, including a horrible divorce and a move back home that Dino and I even started hanging out together as friends... and even that took another year and a half to have me "at hello."

It wasn't until my brother was pointing out some of my friends to Dino that I noticed an interest in him.

Be as it may... when "love " hit... "love" hit hard!!  Kind of like a simmering pot overboiling... our simmering love boiled over  :)

And here we are five months away from celebrating ten years of marriage!! 

Hmmm...

[here's to you finding your... ]

Peace...

I am second..

... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright Laws apply.