Sunday, February 12, 2012

Day 249 ~ The Neverending 90s & Me

By the time the 90s came around, music and fashion was changing once again... from grunge to hip hop and then there was preppie.  I think this is the decade that I realized that I was getting older... I found myself more and more not liking what kids were wearing, most boys' clothes got so baggy that it amazed me that their pants stayed up!  Then of course I had the occasional temptation of wanting to walk up to one of them and yank their pants down to their ankles.  

I tell you I have no clue why boys would think that belting their pants just BELOW the curves of their butts, where their their hamstrings start, is attractive!  I am so happy to let you know that it was not the case with my boys!  Thank you Jesus!!  or maybe... Thank you Grunge.

I definitely feel that the 90s was the beginning of the end for fashion.  I think I may have said that about the 80s as well.  I guess they were both treacherous decades for fashion. 

My dad, Logan and I, Christmas '91
Not only did the decade start off with my marriage on the verge of falling apart...but at the same time I was being blessed with the birth of my second son [on the 23rd of February, 1991], Suddam Hussein was invading Kuwait.  

More importantly I was so blessed by the surprise that I would become a mother for a second time ... funny how God does things for you that he knows you can handle.  As I said Logan was a true blessing in my life, and that in his brother's life as well.

A year and a half after my Logan was born, I had agreed to move to Seattle.  A decision I now regret because I moved away from my family.  However, I made that decision in efforts to save my marriage and get my husband away from all his temptations.  Sadly to say, we divorced a year later... December of 1993.  The following six years proved to be the most challenging in my life... life changing, challenging my belief in myself and my faith in God, as well as having to re-learn who I was.

I can't even begin to guess how many
pogs my boys owned!
I spent the next six years (more or less) in and out of court fighting for my rights to mother my sons, as well as the right to be with them and be a part of their lives.  Through many months, weeks and days of defending myself against the father of my sons' lies, I never once thought of giving up.  While facing false allegations of inappropriately toughing my then three year old baby, some how I found the strength to face all the adversity.  

Yes, they had one of these too!
Although I never regained 100% custody of my sons, I did gain 50%, along with equal visitations and all the other bull shit (yes, I said bull shit) that came with it.  I call it bull shit because our judicial system is so broken.  Their father continued to manipulate and play the system.  The courts allowed a controlling, lying man to keep primary custody of my sons, which allowed him to eventually alienate me from my their lives.

Over eighteen years have passed since.  My sons are grown now.  I can not say that all is behind us...  not even now.  Although one would think so.  Today, my sons and I are constantly working on our relationship.  Healing and moving forward.  Sometimes we're on good terms, and others... well let's just say that their father is very influencial.

I have given it ALL to God, as well as forgiven their father.  I did that for me, not him.  Yes, a little resentment still shows its ugly face once in a while... and then I remind myself that I did my best and to put it behind me.  I also have forgiven myself for my mistakes, which I feel was very important step to take in my journey to better myself.  After all I did allow it all to happen. 

I have been filling a balloon with all of this for a while now, and the balloon keeps popping before I am even able to let it go!  lol!  I just need a heavy duty balloon that's all!  And away it goes!

The Power Rangers took over our
home and many Halloween costumes
Besides that, the 90s brought us Pearl Jam and Nirvana, Rodney King and the bomb that detonated in the parking garage of the World Trade Center.  

The 90s also took one of our sports heroes and basically morphed him into an unrecognizable villain right before our eyes... The infamous white Ford Explorer chase on the Los Angeles freeways lasting nearly two hours (the police wanted OJ to turn himself in) happening three days after the bodies of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman were found murdered.  Fifteen months later, on October 3rd, 1995 the jury returned the verdict of not guilty.  On February 6, 1997, OJ Simpson was then found liable in a civil case against him.  Many feel to this day that he had gotten away with murder.

Some ugly things happened in the 90s.  In a three year period there were fourteen school shooting... with the worse one being at Columbine High School on April 20, 1999, where 14 students and 1 teacher were killed and 23 were left injured with life long scars, with the memories of that day.  

With the bad also came good.  The 90s blessed is with the World Wide Web!! For which I am so sure that we are all very grateful for!!  I know I am.  The dot com companies sprouting left and right, brought us many products and service, later died off just as fast as they showed up.  Check out which ones flopped here.  I worked for #3 on the list, in Seattle,, and left just before the crash. I have to say that it was the best company to work for.  They were first class, until they started to go down.  

We were also introduced to  luxury coffee with the birth of Starbucks (or rather 5bucks as we call it in our family.)   Let's not forget that we also started paying for bottled water.  Drinking water was no longer free.  

How epic was it for me to have moved to Seattle right when grunge was taking off?  The weather there definitely made it real easy for me to get a few flannel shirts in my closet.  Then there were those wonderful high-waist jeans we all used to wear.  Now known as 'mom jeans.'  Funny.  Then of course, the ripped up jeans.  

As far as music, we also were given the talents of Boys II Men, The Wallflowers, The Verve Pipe (one of my favs), The Offspring (my son's favorites), Hootie and the Blowfish, and the likes of Dave Matthews and Destiny's Child.  Again so many more artists to name.. I stop for a moment when I can't think of any more and the flood gates open!!  Creed, Greenday and the Goo Goo Dolls... Oh my goodness... they just keep coming!! Such great music!!! 

Moving on... who can forget the Macarena?  Everyone was dancing it!  A real silly dance too... but it didn't matter, everyone was doing it!

Politically speaking the 90s started with George H Bush running the country for the first two years, with the rest of the decade being taken over by Bill Clinton and his indiscretions.  

We were given the Americans wit Disabilities Act in 1990 to protect Americans with mental and physical disabilities; Don't Ask Don't Tell in 1993 directing people to keep their sexuality to themselves if they wanted to remain in the military; the Brady Bill in 1994 given a five day waiting period for those buying a gun, as well as the North American Free Trade Agreement intended to eliminate barriers when trading between neighboring countries like Mexico and Canada.

The silver screen gave us such great movies like Dances with Wolves, Silence of the Lams, Schindler's List, Forrest Gump and Titanic to name a few.  While television gave us great shows like Friends, Cheers, Home Improvement, Frasier and Seinfeld.  

The 1990s also brought us newcomers Amazon,com, Barnes and Nobles and Borders who drove out all the mom and pop book stores, forcing them to close their doors.

Finally, as far as fads in the 90s, my boys collected hundreds upon hundreds of pogs, there were beannie babies, tickle me elmo, taebo classes, inline skates took over roller skates, and  plenty of video games to choose from.  Tattoos and piercing also became even more popular, than what they were.  I must admit, the only remains I have from the 90s is my belly button piercing and I have four tattoos.  Something that should have probably gone on my 25 Things you don't know about me list.  I did also had my tongue pierced, which lasted about three years before I finally took it out... 

If you live long enough, you'll make mistakes. But if you learn from them, you'll be a better person. It's how you handle adversity, not how it affects you. The main thing is never quit, never quit, never quit.  ~ President Bill Clinton 
You can't handle the truth!  ~ A Few Good Men
It's not a tumor.  ~ Kindergarten Cop
I'm not even supposed to be here today.  ~ Clerks
I see dead people.  ~ The Sixth Sense
Show me the money!  ~  Jerry Maguire
Life is like a box of chocolates.  ~  Forrest Gump
Party on Wayne.  ~ Wayne's World 

Blessings to all!!

116 days to go...

PS... Sons, I love and miss you.  To the moon and stars above and back.  You are my sunshine(s).

Images courtesy of google images.   ©


Margs for Mommy said...

Wow, impressive. Brought back a lot of memories too. Cute idea.

mrsmomx6 said...

Aw man...did I hate most of the 90's...the hair, the cloths, the music, the politics...ugh! I was and still am a total 80's girl! Miss the big the hair and colorful outfits.

I am horrified still by our judicial system and am soooo sorry you've had to suffer though it too. I'm glad you guys are still healing together.

stay strong mama