Friday, September 16, 2011

Day 100 ~ Where is the Light Switch?

It's been one hundred days since I started blogging... I've taken a look back at my blog and seen how much it has evolved.  

A few days ago I was so excited and filled with anticipation...

However... because of the different things that have transpired in the past few days... I now find myself in a very dark place.

I find it so hard to believe, how for some people the sky can fall on top of them... but somehow they find the strength, courage and drive to move on with their lives.

As I sit here and cry while I write my post, I ask you .... How do you do it?  Where do you find the strength, even the courage to move forward?

I am really trying very hard to let go of my past... at least the parts of it that haunt me.  

As a start, I have to accept that my expectations of what my mother should be, are not only too high, but she is not capable of filling those shoes.  However, those shoes I will fill for my daughter and sons.  As for everything else to do with this... it is now in a balloon.

2003 ~ Seattle, Wa
Logan; oh my beautiful child... I pray that God will guide you to do the right things in life, and that maybe one day [soon] you will return to me.

I pray that I can find the strength and courage to walk out of this darkness I have become so accustomed to... 

I have desires, and goals I want to meet.  I just hope that something will happen soon, and my heart will light up once again.

One thing is for sure, I won't give up... I know somehow, somewhere and at some point I will find that darn light switch.

I know I am worth healing.   ~  Louise L. Hay

As I love and accept myself exactly as I am, right here and right now with all my so-called flaws and imperfections, I find it easier to accept others in the same way.  I am learning to release the  need to control others and allow them the freedom to be who they are.  I am learning to create peace within and am doing the best I can with the understanding, knowledge, and awareness that I have at this time.  ~ Louise L. Hay

Blessings to all!!

265 days to go...

All contents herein are protected under Copyright laws and can not be used, altered or copied. All accounts herein are written by Cali-Gal/Carla B Karam and are true accounts of her life. Some names may be changed to protect the innocent.  

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