Friday, June 22, 2012

Day 380 ~ I Am Second Challenge Day 3 of 22

This is Day 3 of my challenge... {and} my third video...

.. Ashley Rawls, figured if she kept her eating under control, stuck to her diet and won a beauty pageant that she would have all the happiness and love she needed.. Once all was achieved, she had trouble in loving who she was, until she reached out to God for answers and found love...  

First and foremost, after watching this video and what Ashley had to say, I feel that all young teen or tween girls who start being self aware should be shown this video.  Wouldn't it be great if schools would show these videos?  Highly doubtful especially since "they" have taken God out of schools.

As far as myself, I am all too familiar with what Ashley went through, beauty pageant and all.  I have been struggling with self image issues for as long as I can remember.  I can't even count all the different diets I have tried, including fast ways of losing weight.

For those of you that do not know, and or are reading my blog for the first time, this past year has been one of healing for me.  A year that I have faced my demons per say.  A year of acceptance of all that has happened in my life.  A year of dealing with my issues.  A year of putting everything {negative} behind and taking charge of my life for once and for all.  

This has also been a year of struggle all the same.  I have been reading, hearing and listening to all who have said that you have to love and respect yourself before anyone else can.  Including being able to stand naked in front of a mirror and tell yourself that you love yourself.

With that said, one of my biggest struggles this past year has been that of loving myself.  

Hmmm... I can honestly say that there are times that I do not like myself, or rather how I react to things.  I am very quick tempered, as well as always on the defensive and can be offended easily, or rather I am very sensitive and have my feelings hurt often.  {I am working on all of the above though}

So, I guess you can say that my behavior at times has kept me from truly loving myself... Well... that and the fact that I have not been able to look at myself {naked} in the mirror and profess my love for myself .  

Don't get me wrong here.  Even with my "attitude flaws", I know that I am a good person.  I have integrity and great morals.  I always have gone for the underdog and am an honest, sincere, and loyal.  I do love those qualities in myself.  But somehow, I don't think that is the same as loving yourself.

I have to be honest here.  One thing I have NEVER thought of is asking for God's assistance.  I have prayed for many things in my life... but I have never prayed for self love.  

Ashley mentions that when at a low point and in a time of need, she reached for her Bible for comfort, her Bible fell open to the book of Romans... and the verses that caught her eyes were 7 and 8.  
For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.  ~Romans 14:7-8 (NIV)
This told Ashley that her body was a temple, and that God would handle things for her.  He would take over... it was not easy for Ashley... nor is it easy for me.  She struggled for years to have normalcy, as I too struggle to find peace within myself, to truly love myself.

So here's to the day that I can stand {naked} in front of a mirror and love myself!

We are Second when we put Jesus First. Seconds are bold to lift up Jesus and tell others. Are you ready to become a stronger Second?

I challenge YOU to take the I Am Second [22] Day Challenge... Can you spare maybe fifteen minutes in a day?


[here's to you finding your... ]


... for a, l & c.  You are my sunshine(s).  

Images are courtesy of google or Bing images.  Some images maybe labeled property of Carla Barila Karam and of this blog, Took It... Making It... Living It... My Life .  © 2012  U.S Copyright laws apply.   

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